EQ,  Success Strategy

Improve your EQ fitness – Self reflection

A few weeks back I wrote this blog post, Feeling- A vital part missing from the thinker’s head. Since then Tom made some progress. These days on the feeling question he responds with “good”, “bad” or “better”! I am so proud of him. It looks like he is ready for the next step of EQ fitness exercise.

In case you are curious about my excitement with EQ, here is some data for your analytic brain.  Prominent psychologist Daniel Goleman found that

  • Emotional intelligence (EQ) is more important than IQ in achieving professional and personal success in our lives.
  • EQ is the primary determinant of the quality of our relationships, at work and in our personal lives
  • EQ is developed and sustained through our interactions with others
  • EQ can be developed throughout our lives through disciplined, focused practice and can radically improve the quality of our lives.

Being aware of one’s own feelings and body sensation is part of self-reflection, one of the three core capacities of EQ. Now Tom’s next assignment is to write down his feeling and body sensation for at least one event every day and to do it for a month.

Here is an example:

Date Event My feeling My body sensation
9/13/2012 For the first time, my 4th grader walked home from school all by herself Nervous, Joy, satisfaction, affection More blood flow in my heart, body felt more grounded.

 

I know Tom’s challenge for the feeling words. So here is a list of feeling words I gave him.

 

Anger Anxiety Fear Joy Love Sadness Shame
Agitated

Anger

Annoyed

Appalled

Disgusted

Frustrated

Irritated

Outraged

Rage

Spiteful

Upset

Vindictive

Anxious

Confused

Distant

Dulled

Frantic

Helpless

Impatient

Intense

Nervous

Overwhelmed

Paralyzed

Perplexed

Queasy

Skeptical

Stressed

Uneasy

Alarmed

Defensive

Doubtful

Dread

Fearful

Frightened

Reluctant

Startled

Suspicious

Tense

Worried

Alive

Bold

Brave

Capable

Comfortable

Confident

Curious

Delighted

Dynamic

Eager

Elated

Energized

Excited

Glad

Gleeful

Hopeful

Joyful

Attention

Caring

Comforting

Compassion

Concerned

Encouraged

Engaged

Gentle

Honored

Open

Respected

Secure

Tender

Crushed

Disappointed

Discouraged

Distraught

Distressed

Empty

Grief

Lonely

Lost

Miserable

Mournful

Remorseful

Resigned

Sad

Sorry

Terrible

 

Ashamed

Burdened

Condemned

Culpable

Despised

Disgraced

Dread

Embarrassed

Guilty

Harassed

Humiliated

Inept

Inadequate

Regretful

Shame

 

 Reference: EQ Fitness Handbook by Jan Johnson

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