• Happiness,  Leadership,  Personal Brand,  Uncategorized

    Courage From Within – How Conviction And Trust Can Help

    Growing up I didn’t think I had much courage. One day I saw this quote saying: Courage is not the absence of fear it is acting despite — because something is important to us. That made perfect sense! Fear will always be there and that might be a good thing as it enforces us to prepare well by doing the due diligence. Conviction is an important part of courage. I am able to bring courage because my conviction about the matter is stronger than the fear. 22 years ago, when I first came to the US for my grad school, it was the very first time for me to be in a foreign…

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    Feeling overwhelmed? You might be overloading your PFC

    Do you often feel overwhelmed? Do you wonder why it happens? Understanding a bit of how our brain works might give you some idea. The part of the brain behind our forehead is called the prefrontal cortex(PFC). PFC is a very small part compared to the rest of the brain (where permanent memory resides, in the form of patterns). PFC mainly performs the executive functions (processing, analysis, decision making etc.). PFC needs lots of energy to function, not only that, at a time it can handle only a few pieces of information, e.g. three numbers at a time. For example, think about a 10 digit phone number, when you have it like 4258234417 VS 425-821-4417, notice,…

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    Feeling- A vital part missing from the thinker’s head

    “What do you feel now?” I ask my client Tom in the middle of our session. “I think it is, …”, he replies. “What do you feel”, I ask persistently. “Well, I think it could be …”; little baffled, Tom reiterates his thoughts. In Tom’s mind “feeling” is a synonym of “thinking”, he(who is an engineer) lives and breathes in his head, the rest of the body underneath merely serves as a pedestal for his head! Tom is not alone. When I first came for my coach training I had hard time with these “feeling’ questions. I didn’t know much about it other than, feeling good or bad. Then when…

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    A Baby step isn’t just for the Babies

    In my 1:1 coaching and group classes, I have been teaching this concept from TED on how to create your own vision (what do you want) and design baby steps to take you closer to that vision.  A baby step is not just the execution; the idea, the planning, even as simple as carving out a solid 30 min from your busy day to think about your vision could be a baby step. A baby step gives you more clarity about your vision; it gives you added experience and learning. Even when you fail, a conscious baby step always takes you closer to realizing your vision. Zynga CEO Mark Pincus said…

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    Overnight success- How realistic is that assumption?

    I sometimes wished one fine morning I will get the results I always wanted; I will get the solution of my problems. But alas it never happened that easily!  My grandma used to say, our luck is buried under a rock, and it requires lots of effort to get it out; whereas “others” have it under a leaf, a wind blows and they find their fortune! For many years I felt less fortunate as nothing came easy for me. As I grew older and learned a thing or two, I realized many of the cases of those “fortunate others” actually took a great deal of failures, sacrifices and extra efforts to get to where…

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    Drive – The Surprising truth about what Motivates us

    Carrot and stick – reward and punishment- is an age old technique for getting things done by others. The corporate world has adopted this mantra almost as the panacea for employee motivation. But Daniel Pink tells us a different story.  He says, carrot and stick works well only when the task is algorithmic (well defined steps), it loses its effectiveness for tasks that requires even little bit of thinking and creativity. In today’s world most high-tech jobs have lots of ambiguity and demand lots of creativity in order to perform them well. According to Pink, the employers need to start thinking different ways for motivating these knowledge workers. When an…

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    The Silly Brain that makes hasty decisions

    Monday morning @8:35AM: My daughter Farheen is supposed to be at her breakfast table 5 minutes ago. She comes downstairs with a long face, “Mommy, my bracelet is missing”. My tension rises, if she doesn’t head out in 10 minutes she will be late for school. My voice is about to go up…, just in time another thought stops me – if I do this now she may be in school on time but I will feel miserable the entire day.  I take a deep breath and assure her that I will see about it if she eats first. As she starts the reluctant bites I tell her a little story that goes like…

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    Already off track for your New Year’s Resolution? Find out how to do better

    Found this statistics – almost all Americans make a new year’s resolution. The bad news is that half of them break their new year’s resolution by January 2 and more than 90% of those resolutions are forgotten by April 1. So if you are having hard time keeping your resolution you are in the majority group. If you want it otherwise here is some food for thought. Take a look at the bigger purpose you had for your New Year’s resolution or goal. Purpose is the soul of goals and goals are the means by which you express your purpose in the world. If your goal is to go to…

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    Why does it bother Me?

    Few years ago I volunteered as a treasurer in an organization. My motivation was to build some skill in accounting work and to get engaged with the leadership team. It was going well for the most part. The reason I say “most part” because from time to time one particular member was giving me unsolicited advice on how to do my job. At first I tried to ignore her, but eventually, it pushed me over the edge.  I needed to do something about it! Being relatively new to the team I decided to talk to someone I trusted. Fortunately this trusted member was a coach. She agreed with me that the…

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    Empowering Language – Lighten up your life with this simple technique

      Language is power.  When we speak, we exercise the power of language to transform reality. —Julia Penelope What we say and how we say it impacts our own experience and the experience we have of other people in our life.  Our communication has an impact not only on a cognizant, mental level, but also at many subtle levels.  Words convey underlying messages to our subconscious mind, evoking physical, emotional, mental and spiritual meaning for others and for us. Some words and phrases are less empowering (or effective) than others.  For example, say the following phrase to yourself: "I have to stop at the bank on my way home".  Pay…