Executive coaching is a powerful, personalized tool for leaders who want to transform anxiety into focus and pressure into clarity. If you’ve ever felt anxious or blanked out during a high-stakes meeting, this story is for you.

A Setback Triggered a Path for Growth

Prasad, a senior director at a global tech company, shared this with me in an executive coaching session:

“I froze. They asked a simple follow-up during the leadership review, and I couldn’t recall the background of the number, even though I knew it. My mind just went blank.”

It was a jarring moment for him. He was seasoned, smart, and well-prepared. But performance anxiety doesn’t discriminate—it can affect anyone.

Understanding the Biological Response to Pressure

Even in modern office settings, our bodies still react to stress the same way they did thousands of years ago. A question from the C-suite? Your nervous system interprets it like a tiger’s chase: heart races, palms sweat, your mind freezes. Daniel Goleman called it as the Amygdala hijack.

This “fight, flight, or freeze” response is biologically wired. In this state, the prefrontal cortex—the brain’s logic center—goes offline, and the amygdala takes over. Rational thinking becomes nearly impossible.

It is like when the fire alarm goes off in your building. All you hear is the loud sound and flashing lights – no high-level, business strategy conversation can happen at that time, the only thing you can do is leave the building to save your life.

Coaching Intervention: From Full Mind to Mindful

That’s why logic won’t calm performance anxiety. We need a physical solution to a physical reaction.

I guided Prasad through five mindful breaths: inhale for four counts, exhale for six. Within a minute, his posture changed. His breath deepened. His clarity returned. He was pleasantly surprised by such a quality shift with such a simple practice. He decided he could use such practice every day to keep himself centered and be more effective.

Science supports this: short breathing exercises help regulate the nervous system, reduce amygdala activation, and restore access to executive function.

Why Mindfulness Matters for Leaders

Mindfulness isn’t just about calm—it’s about cognition. Regular mindfulness practice helps shrink and desensitize the amygdala while strengthening the prefrontal cortex, enhancing your capacity for thoughtful leadership. (source)

Prasad began using these mindful pauses daily—not just before meetings, but between tasks and transitions. He reported feeling clearer, more grounded, and more effective.

Now that he was in his zone, I took the opportunity for further coaching – his mindset.

Perspective Shift: From Performance to Partnership

Next, we explored his mindset. When I asked, “How do you view these leadership meetings?” he replied:

“Like a performance. If I falter, I might lose future opportunities. I need to look perfect.”

This is a common trap for ambitious leaders. But I encouraged him to rethink it: “Why are these senior leaders spending time in these meetings?”

“To guide the project… to offer feedback… maybe support,” he answered.

Exactly. These are not evaluations—they’re collaborations. When he reframed the meetings as a shared problem-solving space rather than a spotlight performance, his nervousness eased. However he was still skeptical. “If I don’t perform, they might give the promotion to another person”, Prasad shared his fear.

Why Fear-Driven Leadership Doesn’t Work

Fear might get you moving, but it doesn’t get the best out of you—or your team. Research in emotional intelligence shows that sustainable leadership thrives in states of joy, curiosity, and connection—not threat or fear. According to the We-I Profile, an EQ assessment instrument, leaders who operate from connection and meaning show greater resilience and creativity under pressure.

Throughout our executive coaching engagement, Prasad began to shift from leading out of fear of failure to leading with purpose—driven by his passion for delivering a high-quality product to customers.

Along the way, we uncovered another limiting mindset that was holding him back: viewing hierarchy as an authority to appease rather than a group of partners to collaborate with.

Leadership Mindset: From Hierarchy to Collaboration

Many professionals unconsciously fall into a “parent-child” dynamic with senior leaders—seeking approval or avoiding disapproval, rather than engaging as equals. But today’s leadership landscape, especially in our VUCA (Volatile, Uncertain, Complex, and Ambiguous) world, demands co-creation over compliance. Thriving in this environment requires us to operate from an “Adult–Adult” mindset—where individuals bring mutual respect, shared ownership, and complementary roles to the table.

At this stage of his coaching journey, Prasad began challenging this ingrained belief. He shifted from trying to impress authority figures to intentionally engaging them—as partners in a shared mission. This change empowered him to lead with greater authenticity, confidence, and strategic clarity.

From Insight to Impact: Prasad’s Transformation

After several months of consistent mindfulness and coaching, Prasad began to lead in a different way. He reflected:

“Now I ask, how can I engage us as a team? Instead of, how do I avoid screwing up?”

This shift—from fear to curiosity, from isolation to collaboration—unlocked not just higher performance, but more sustainable, meaningful impact. Here is a quick summary of Prasad’s leadership toolbox:

5 Mindfulness Tips for Leadering in High-Stake Situations

• Pause & Breathe: Before meetings, inhale for 4 counts, exhale for 6. Do it five times.
• Reframe: Ask, “Is this a performance—or a partnership?”
• Stay Curious: Replace self-defense with inquiry. Ask questions to clarify.
• Challenge Assumptions: Reflect, “What story am I telling myself about authority here?”
• Reflect: After meetings, jot down what went well and where anxiety crept in.

Final Thought: Lead from the Inside Out

Executive coaching isn’t just about changing how you work—it’s about changing your inner operating system, how you see yourself as a leader.

Through mindfulness and mindset work, you can reduce anxiety, lead with clarity, and create collaborative momentum across your team. You become the leader who stays grounded in the storm—and inspires others to do the same.

So before your next big meeting, take a few mindful breaths and then ask:

“What story am I holding—and what might shift if Isee it differently?”

Ready to lead with calm and confidence?

If you’re an executive or senior leader who wants to reduce anxiety and elevate your leadership, reach out for a coaching readiness conversation. Let’s explore how executive coaching can support your transformation.

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Feature photo is by Photo by Kampus Production