5 Misconceptions That Get In The Way Of Sustainable Success

Over the years, through my coaching work with tech leaders and executives, I’ve helped them uncover hidden misconceptions and limiting behaviors that often hold them back. Many of these leaders were already highly successful, yet by identifying and addressing these patterns, they found new ways to accelerate their growth more sustainably and more fulfilling. Recognizing these blind spots allowed them to approach challenges with greater clarity, adaptability, and confidence. Based on these experiences, I’ve summarized the five most common limiting patterns that, when overcome, can elevate leadership impact and personal fulfillment.

Misconception 1: Starting with Others’ Expectations

Many of us begin by focusing on what’s expected of us, conforming to others’ demands in exchange for money, status, and validation. This approach is common and even effective in roles primarily requiring physical labor or strict processes. However, for knowledge workers and leaders, a mindset of pure compliance can be limiting. As leaders, our roles require creativity, innovation, and proactive problem-solving—qualities that can’t thrive if we approach our work with a mindset solely driven by meeting others’ expectations.

Consider Tom, a director of engineering who felt overburdened because his boss kept increasing his responsibilities despite his already packed schedule. During our coaching sessions, I encouraged him to explore what he wanted to do, assuming that his boss was already satisfied with his contributions. This question helped Tom reconnect with his passion for tackling challenging problems and collaborating with his team to find solutions. Shifting his focus from mere compliance to active contribution, he devised innovative ideas, shared them with his VP, and ultimately boosted his team’s performance. Not only did he earn recognition from his own team, but other teams also took notice of his achievements. This transformation was possible because he shifted from a compliance-driven mindset to a creative, purpose-driven one.

Certainly, honoring core expectations is essential, but it shouldn’t be our only driver. When we align our responsibilities with our intrinsic motivations and strengths, we fully engage in our roles and generate more meaningful, impactful results. By balancing others’ expectations with our own aspirations, we unlock the potential for true professional fulfillment and success.

Misconception 2: “I have to Ace Every Area at Work”

When we are in school, being a “good student” means excelling in every subject—a sign of competence, success, and rank among peers. However, bringing this mindset into the workplace can create unrealistic expectations and unnecessary stress.

Take Mary, a senior business development professional who felt inadequate compared to her peers, as she didn’t have the same skills or experience as some of them. Through our sessions, I helped her recognize that, like her peers, she had unique strengths of her own. When Mary reconnected with her “superpower,” a visible shift occurred—she smiled, and within a month, she turned around several of her most challenging accounts. She later joked that her biggest lesson was realizing she didn’t need to get an “A” in everything; a “B” was perfectly fine. Letting go of this perfectionist mindset freed her to focus on her strengths, bringing out her best work without the weight of unnecessary pressure.

When we stop aiming for perfection in every area, we can channel our energy into areas where we naturally excel, allowing our strengths to shine and driving more impactful results.

Misconception 3: Confusing the Desire to Excel with Competitiveness

One senior director I worked with believed his competitiveness was what drove him to excel. However, as he shared stories of his “wins,” I noticed that his success stemmed more from a genuine desire for growth and improvement—a hallmark of a growth mindset—than from any need to outperform others. When I pointed this out, he agreed, and this awareness brought him a more grounded, calm energy in place of the constant adrenaline rush that had previously fueled him. As a result, he felt a deeper sense of peace and satisfaction in his work.

While a competitive mindset can inspire us to push harder, it often leads us to focus on outperforming others rather than on personal growth. A win-lose attitude can encourage behaviors that strain relationships and create unnecessary tension or drama. Shifting from a competitive drive to a growth-oriented mindset allows us to strive for excellence without sacrificing collaboration and harmony, fostering a more fulfilling and balanced path to success.

Misconception 4: “I Have to Be Connected All the Time”

In today’s world, managing our attention has become a challenge, with the biggest source of distraction right in our pockets. Our devices are not only tools for work but also satisfy our need for connection and belonging. However, this constant connectivity can easily shift from helpful to overwhelming.

Our brains naturally seek the path of least resistance—scrolling a newsfeed or checking social media is often more tempting than tackling a complex book or a challenging project. This creates a cycle: every spare moment becomes an opportunity to check what others are doing or see the latest reactions to our posts. This translates to frequent checks of emails, Slack, or Teams at work, creating a habit of near-constant digital “connection.”

Yet our brains aren’t wired to sustain focus for 8-9 hours straight; they need meaningful, restorative breaks. When we take a break from attention-intensive tasks, reaching for our devices to “unwind” is tempting, but this adds cognitive load instead of providing true rest. A snack break, a quick walk outside, or even a short nap offers far more rejuvenation and resets our minds for the next challenge. Disconnecting periodically gives our brains the real break they need to recharge, helping us return to work with clarity and energy.

Misconception 5: “I Shouldn’t Share Ideas Until they are Fully Formed”

This common misconception often prevents people from sharing initial ideas, especially those who are naturally more reflective or introverted. While taking time to think things through can improve the quality of ideas, it can also become a barrier. Holding back because an idea feels “incomplete” can limit opportunities for collaboration and feedback, which are essential for refining thoughts and gaining new perspectives. Moreover, staying silent may inadvertently make us appear disengaged or hesitant to contribute, which can affect how others perceive our competence.

Many of the great ideas we see today began as rough drafts—concepts that evolved over time through feedback and discussion. Sharing an early, unfinished thought can be the spark that leads to a breakthrough, especially when it’s enriched by others’ perspectives. If you’re hesitant, consider prefacing your idea with phrases like “This is an early thought” or “This is a work in progress.” This can help set expectations while inviting constructive input that could make your idea more impactful.

I hope these five misconceptions have sparked some valuable reflections for you. Which of these resonated with you the most, and how might shifting your perspective in this area impact your growth?