Discover how a high-performing woman of color shifted from exhaustion and burnout to strategic, confident leadership—and built a healthier, more fulfilling life.

When Jessica began her coaching journey, her life looked flawless from the outside. She was the go-to person for her team and manager, the reliable high-performer who delivered no matter the challenge. Her open-door policy was legendary, and her team respected and liked her.

But behind the scenes, Jessica was running on empty. She was consistently the last one to log off, the “cleanup crew” for any messes, and the person who quietly took on extra work to ensure quality. This self-sacrificing pattern extended beyond work into her personal life, where she was on-call 24/7 for family, offering advice, making arrangements, and handling crises.

She had fallen into a cycle of over-responsibility, believing it was her job to fix everything for everyone. The cost? Chronic exhaustion, no time for herself, and the quiet erosion of her own ambitions.

The Shift from Rescuer to Empowerer

Over six months of leadership coaching, Jessica went through a profound transformation. The breakthrough? Realizing her role as a leader wasn’t to rescue—it was to empower.

The Power of TED book teaches us that the Rescuer takes on others’ problems to feel needed and maintain control, often at the cost of their own well-being. While appearing helpful, this behavior ultimately creates dependence and prevents others from developing their problem-solving abilities. A positive shift of a rescuer is a creator or an empowerer, focuses on possibilities and solutions, encouraging others to take ownership of their choices and actions.

This shift changed the way she approached both work and life:

• Establishing Boundaries: Jessica learned to set clear, healthy boundaries without guilt. She began coaching her team and communicating expectations instead of stepping in to do the work herself.
  
• Embracing Delegation: She became comfortable handing off responsibilities, creating space to focus on higher-level strategy instead of getting bogged down in day-to-day execution.
  
• Practicing Self-Grace: She let go of perfectionism, recognizing that her value wasn’t in doing it all flawlessly. She began allowing herself more rest and recovery and less guilt and self-criticism.
  
• Prioritizing Herself: Jessica adopted the mantra “Choose me first.” She assessed requests strategically, saying no to those that didn’t align with her goals or capacity.
  

Internal Validation: She released the belief—common among many women of color in corporate spaces—that she needed to be “twice as good” to be respected. She began to see her worth as intrinsic, not dependent on others’ approval.

Small Shifts, Big Impact

Jessica’s transformation wasn’t about one dramatic moment. It was about a series of small, consistent changes that built momentum.

She started with micro-actions:

• Logging off by 6 p.m.
  
• Taking a bubble bath every Friday night
  
• Setting aside Saturdays for creative hobbies
  

These self-care habits gave her space to think, breathe, and reconnect with herself.

Her coaching sessions focused on practical, targeted leadership skills:

• Delegating Meetings: In her first session, she handed off a recurring meeting, regaining valuable time and building confidence to delegate more.
  
• Setting Expectations: She learned to focus on what was in her control—taking lunch breaks, managing her calendar—instead of waiting for her manager to change.
  
• Navigating Change: During a period of organizational upheaval, she prioritized her own well-being while supporting her team through uncertainty.
  
• Difficult Conversations: Jessica began addressing issues directly, whether with a demanding boss or an underperforming team member, without getting discouraged by fear of repercussion..
  

The thread through all of these? Self-preservation. Before saying yes, she now asks: “Does this have to be done by me?”

The Deeper Insight

Jessica’s biggest “aha” moment came when she understood why she had been stuck in rescuer mode.

For years, she believed overworking was proof of her value. As a woman of color in corporate leadership, she felt an unspoken pressure to justify her promotion by going above and beyond, often at her own expense.

“My rescuing the team was me trying to prove to my leaders that their decision to promote me was worth it,” she reflected. “Now, I realize I need to trust my abilities and give myself internal validation.”

She also recognized that others’ biases or dismissive behaviors were not her responsibility to fix. This clarity freed her to advocate for herself with confidence.

“I deserve to go higher,” she said. “This time, I will ask for the promotion instead of doubting it when it’s offered to me.”

Lessons for Leaders Everywhere

Jessica’s journey is a powerful case study in leadership transformation, especially for high-achieving professionals who feel stuck in overdrive.

Her experience shows that sustainable success requires:

1. Clarity on your role: Leaders coach, guide, and empower—not rescue.
   
2. Boundaries as a leadership skill: Protecting your time and energy benefits both you and your team.
   
3. Delegation as a growth strategy: Freeing yourself from work you already know how to do creates space for big-picture thinking, and delegation helps others to stretch and grow by learning new skills.
   
4. Self-validation: Your worth is not measured by overwork or constant availability.
   
5. Courage to advocate: Asking for what you deserve is part of leading yourself well.
   

Why This Matters for Women and Leaders of Color

Many women and leaders from underrepresented backgrounds face unspoken pressures to prove themselves, work harder, and avoid mistakes at all costs. This “invisible tax” can lead to chronic burnout and hinder long-term career growth.

Jessica’s story demonstrates that breaking this cycle isn’t just possible—it’s transformative. When leaders stop over-functioning, they not only protect their well-being but also unlock the full potential of their teams.

Don’t Wait, Step Into Empowered Leadership Today

If Jessica’s story resonates with you, you might be in a similar place—high-performing, respected, but secretly running on fumes.

The good news? You don’t have to choose between career success and personal well-being. With the right support, you can shift from reactive and exhausted to strategic and empowered, just like Jessica did.

I help high-achieving leaders, especially women and leaders of color, break free from over-responsibility, set boundaries without guilt, and lead with clarity and confidence.

Schedule a complimentary executive coaching strategy call to explore how to shift from exhaustion to empowerment. 

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Feature Photo by Christina @ wocintechchat.com on Unsplash