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Improve your EQ fitness – Self reflection
A few weeks back I wrote this blog post, Feeling- A vital part missing from the thinker’s head. Since then Tom made some progress. These days on the feeling question he responds with “good”, “bad” or “better”! I am so proud of him. It looks like he is ready for the next step of EQ fitness exercise. In case you are curious about my excitement with EQ, here is some data for your analytic brain. Prominent psychologist Daniel Goleman found that Emotional intelligence (EQ) is more important than IQ in achieving professional and personal success in our lives. EQ is the primary determinant of the quality of our relationships, at work and in…
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Too many to-dos… Not enough time…Cause or Symptom?
My friend Amy calls herself lazy as she is always running behind her infinitely long to-do list. Even when she is sitting down she feels guilty that she was supposed to do something useful. She says sorry a zillion times as she frequently cancels our coffee/phone chats at the last moment. Seeing her hyperactivity makes me feel underperformed:). I have been wondering why we are always behind despite all the hard work? Why she feels compelled to say “Yes” to every request? Recently found some answer from this article. Saying “Yes” 1. Avoids conflicts 2. Takes less time than pausing to decide whether or not the request is truly important 3. Feels…
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A Baby step isn’t just for the Babies
In my 1:1 coaching and group classes, I have been teaching this concept from TED on how to create your own vision (what do you want) and design baby steps to take you closer to that vision. A baby step is not just the execution; the idea, the planning, even as simple as carving out a solid 30 min from your busy day to think about your vision could be a baby step. A baby step gives you more clarity about your vision; it gives you added experience and learning. Even when you fail, a conscious baby step always takes you closer to realizing your vision. Zynga CEO Mark Pincus said…
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Overnight Success – How Realistic is that Assumption?
I sometimes wished one fine morning I will get the results I always wanted; I will get the solution to my problems. But alas it never happened that easily! My grandma used to say, our luck is buried under a rock, and it requires lots of effort to get it out; whereas “others” have it under a leaf, a wind blows and they find their fortune! For many years I felt less fortunate as nothing came easy for me. As I grew older and learned a thing or two, I realized many of the cases of those “fortunate others” actually took plenty of failures, sacrifices, and extra efforts to get to where they are…
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TED finds the lost ring
I have been busy with this week’s webinar. The topic is from the Power of TED; Empowerment is all I have in my mind. I even empowered myself to be okay with taking a break from my weekly posts. But then I found this gift, call it the law of attraction or anything else! Here it is: When I was walking my daughter to school, I noticed she was holding the light-up ring in her hand (she bought it with her allowance money last week). I knew she misplaced it last night and had asked me about it. I got curious and asked her how she found it. She smiled wisely. “You know…
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Drive – The Surprising Truth about what Motivates us
Carrot and stick – reward and punishment- is an age-old technique for getting things done by others. The corporate world has adopted this mantra almost as the panacea for employee motivation. But Daniel Pink tells us a different story. He says carrot and sticks works well only when the task is algorithmic (well-defined steps), it loses its effectiveness for tasks that requires even little bit of thinking and creativity. In today’s world, most high-tech jobs have lots of ambiguity and demand lots of creativity in order to perform them well. According to Pink, employers need to start thinking about different ways of motivating these knowledge workers. When an employee gets…
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The Silly Brain that makes Hasty Decisions
Monday morning @8:35AM: My daughter Farheen is supposed to be at her breakfast table 5 minutes ago. She comes downstairs with a long face, “Mommy, my bracelet is missing”. My tension rises, if she doesn’t head out in 10 minutes she will be late for school. My voice is about to go up…, just in time another thought stops me – if I do this now she may be in school on time but I will feel miserable the entire day. I take a deep breath and assure her that I will see about it if she eats first. As she starts the reluctant bites I tell her a little story that goes like…
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Already Off Track for your New Year’s Resolution? Find out how to do better
Found these statistics – almost all Americans make a new year’s resolution. The bad news is that half of them break their new year’s resolution by January 2 and more than 90% of those resolutions are forgotten by April 1. So if you are having a hard time keeping your resolution you are in the majority group. If you want it otherwise here is some food for thought. Take a look at the bigger purpose you had for your New Year’s resolution or goal. The purpose is the soul of goals and goals are the means by which you express your purpose in the world. If your goal is to…
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There is always more than one solution!
We are having a record amount of snowfall here in Seattle. My little girl is having the fun of her lifetime, snowball fight, making snowman, sledding, you name it! Though I was a little lazy initially, now I am enjoying it too. Even shoveling seems to be fun. This afternoon when I was trying to clean up the driveway my daughter wanted to do it too. With having only one shovel, taking turns seemed to be the only choice we had. But I was getting a little impatient as it would be hard to finish the work before evening. At first, I thought I will just be the parent and…
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Empowering Language – Change the Word to Change the Outcome
Language is power. When we speak, we exercise the power of language to transform reality. —Julia PenelopeWhat, we say and how we say it impacts our own experience and the experience we have of other people in our life. Our communication has an impact not only on a conscious, mental level but also on many subtle levels. Words convey underlying messages to our subconscious mind, evoking physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual meaning for others and us. Some words and phrases are less empowering (or useful) than others. For example, say the following words to yourself: “I have to stop at the bank on my way home”. Pay particular attention to…
